Big No

I kick off when I’m scared and being judged

I fight back even when I’m being loved

And the fear

And the pain

My tears

Were shame

I hold back when I speak and lose my nerve

I feel lost now that I pretend so much

When I needed you to trust

In the middle of the night

You know I wasn’t there enough

For you to decide

Big no, big no, big no, big no

And the fear

And my pain

The last meal that I made

Well it haunts me

To this day

And I don’t feel the same