Captain Gullible (Dave? Funny Name for a Girl)

I believe in peace and love.

And I believe in Him above.

And I believe that life is fine.

And I believe that all is mine.

And if I give you a fiver I believe

it will be back in my hand by the end of the week.

And I believe what TV tells my eyes.

And I believe that pigs can fly.

And I believe that Hitler’s still alive.

If you pull faces in the wind, you will say cross-eyed.

And walking under ladders is wrong

And the starship Enterprise is feasible and won’t be long.

My girlfriends dedicated to me,

She said she’d walk on water for me.

My girlfriend’s going out tonight,

she’s with her friend so it’s alright.

Her friend is called Dave!

Funny name for a girl?

And they tell me that they love me.

Then while I’m on cloud nine - having a great time,

they spend all my money.

But that’s what love is all about -

I should know ‘cause I’ve been told!

It was written on the back of matchbox that was

given to me by a friend ‘cause he said he thought it might help!

And I believe in 21-pound notes

and there’s a one-way tube to John O’ Groats.

And I believe the government is okay.

And I believe that maybe Johnny Zee swings the other way.

You wouldn’t point a loaded gun at me!

‘cause we’re such very good friends you see!?

You wouldn’t point a loaded gun at me!

I trust you implicitly!

You wouldn’t point a loaded gun at me!?

And the only reason you put the gun between my eyes,

pulled the trigger and then buried my body in an unmarked grave,

is because I believe that you love me.