Mr. Popeil

I need a Veg-o-Matic!

I need a Pocket Fisherman!

I need a handy appliance

That'll scramble an egg while it's still inside its shell!

(Operators are standing by, how does that make you feel?)

Help me

Mr. Popeil!

I wanna shine some pennies!

I wanna mend some leather!

I wanna Krazy Glue my head to the bottom of a big steel girder!

(Please, no C.O.D.'s, don't miss out on this deal)

Ah, help me

Mr. Popeil!

Help me

Mr. Popeil!

Mr. Popeil!

Mr. Popeil!

(Woo, woo, ohh)

It slices, it dices

Look at that tomato!

You could even cut a tin can with it

But you wouldn't want to!

Mr. Popeil, I'm in trouble

Need your assistance on the double

Oh no! Now how am I gonna make

My old vinyl car top look like new?

(Mr. Popeil)

Tell me, what am I s'posed to do?

Mr. Popeil!

Mr. Popeil!

(Now how much would you pay?)

But wait, there's more!

It's not sold in any store!

(Now how much would you pay?)

Don't answer yet

Just look what else you get!

(Now how much would you pay?)

If you order today

You get a Ginsu knife and a smokeless ashtray!

(Now how much would you pay?)

Now how much would you pay?

Mr. Popeil, Mr. Popeil

Mr. Popeil, Mr. Popeil

Mr. Popeil, Mr. Popeil

Mr. Popeil, Mr. Popeil

Make me buy a Garden Weasel!

Make me buy a Bamboo Steamer!

Make me take advantage of this amazing TV offer!

(Call our toll-free number, we'll make you such a deal)

Aw, help me!

Mr. Popeil, I want it!

(Mr. Popeil)

Well, I need it!

(Mr. Popeil)

I got to, got to, got to have it!

Mr. Popeil!

Mr. Popeil!

Hey!