It's like

I met you at my parent's house when I was 14

Seen you my whole life but never got to me

You'd always post in the kitchen

I knew the shelf you lived in

Above where the fridge is, but we never kicked it

Finally I decided to pull you down

Had Pac in the background, pulled the shot glasses out

Grabbed you by your neck even though we just met

Held you close, felt the fire burn my throat

Warmth like the Holy Ghost

I remember thinking, "Is this real life?"

I had two and wondered what four more would feel like

Predisposed to having an obsession

Codependent before we even had a friendship

Had a dozen of you, already loved you, I couldn't stop

Got on the metro stumbling to 3rd and Pine block

Hit the Micky D's, puked all over the restaurant

Our first date was already running from the cops

I ride with you, lie for you

My tried and true, love I never knew

It kills me to think of a life without you

But sometimes I wonder if you want me to die too

In highschool our relationship was abusive

Addicted to being together, couldn't control my usage

We pass out together on a stranger's lawn

Woke up in a random car too gone to make it to my own prom

But I had to have you even though we'd pass out in bathrooms

Take a month off to show myself

I know myself, don't need no help

Forget the pain, pouring rain

Brown bag full of guilt and shame

Mistress controlling my head

Getting arrested, not remembering anything that I said

And I knew then that I should've left

And I could see if I didn't leave

You'd lead me to death but

I ride with you, lie for you

My tried and true, love I never knew

It kills me to think of a life without you

But sometimes I wonder if you want me to die too

Bitch, you killed my uncle, you're fucking trouble

Socially acceptable and oh, so subtle

You ruined my life and I fucking loved you

Promised relief and left me with a rusty shovel

And some busted rubble

Pieces of my life that you destroyed was once freedom and joy

Was now depression, being unemployed

And I knew I had to change it and face it

And checked into rehab

And 28 days later I remembered who I really was

I remembered where I'm really from

I remembered the beauty of the present moment

That you only get when you connect to the Creator

And the breath inside the chest that fully fills your lungs

I found the people with the same allergy

And what I thought was love was really just my disease

I always thought the problem was you and couldn't believe

When I learned that the whole time my issue was me

I ride with you, lie for you

My tried and true, love I never knew

It kills me to think of a life without you

But sometimes I wonder if you want me to die too

I ride with you, lie for you

My tried and true, love I never knew

It kills me to think of a life without you

But sometimes I wonder if you want me to die too