It's just another habit to get used to

You hold it like resentment, wet grass in the park on my back

Through the shirt that I borrowed from you last year

It's just another corner I curl up in the back of your mind in

But you follow me down where you know you shouldn't follow

I got shit I gotta tell you we both know I swallow

Like the carvings in the mirrors of the truck stop bathrooms, baby, I see you everywhere

It's just another come up in the pit of my stomach at the bus stop

My pockets full of all the shit I need just to get out of here

It's just a couple pressed pills and my tin snips

I give an hour on the beach to this pack of cigs

You wanna meet me in the diner with your secret bottle

Hold the bitter on my tongue just to taste what I swallow for once

You hold me down in the garbage grove

Down where the darkest ripest fruit grows

Flashing lights, appeasement's automatic

Between my eyes just tv static

Whatever you wanna hear baby

That's the way it goes

Pin my wrists against the sunrise

Feel the bottle between my bare thighs sliding

Like a bronco I was made to ride your highs and lows

I'm choking down my thoughts with cross-tops, old bitter coffee just for good luck

I wouldn't blame you for leaving darling, if I could walk away I would

But at the end of the day, it ain't a choice you make

After enough of my shit you just disengage

So I just lean into my brain and watch the sunrise from the back porch

See your car parked in the driveway when I bike down to the liquor store

But these gears are fixed, baby, there ain't no slowing down, just point those handlebars down that hole you found

'Cause in those lights, appeasement's automatic

Between my eyes just tv static

Whatever you wanna hear baby

That's the way it goes

Pin my wrists against the sunrise

Feel the bottle between my bare thighs sliding

Like a bronco I was made to ride your highs and lows

I'm burning letters and old notebooks, gonna let that tired kid lay down in the burned out hallways of my stoned reflections

All the things she needs, all that quiet harm drowns in

Sunburns, showers, sharpie notes from strangers on her arms

I light a candle for my body: happy birthday birthright enemy

Pull me out cause im not breathing I'm always face down in the deep end

Where every moment, like broken glass, a holding cell, a furtive glance

Falls in squares of light against an empty bedroom floor: I lie there heaving

Beneath the bad voice, the mental seasons, just let the year go and call it even

All that's left, my friend's, that love you chose: to ride your highs and lows