If Only

The mainstream songs be cool and all right, but

I rather make songs like this, man

Feel like rappin' today

I talk to God, prayin' He show me somethin

But most times I don't really see nothin

I wonderin' if He lookin

Grammy told me tighten up, God comin

My dawg didn't, so the Lord came and took him

He lived life to the fullest

I wish life had a reset button

Like why my **** had to leave all a sudden?

From a push of a button

This little engine that could still chuggin

Still on the track, and I still ain't budgin

No, I still ain't budgin', uh

I don't reflect the private school I was put in

Still was movin' with the rough and the rugged

I thought God could only judge us

Bro was playin' with bullets

Twelve grabbed him, told him talk

He told him end the discussion

That's ha'd go when you thuggin

That's ha'd go when you comin' from nothin

Though we blessed, we still hustlin' like our stomach was touchin

I the goat, they lookin' at me like mutton

They ain't wanna see you rise like a muffin

And I still ain't budgin

Bro was covered in white sheets

I thought God had us covered

I ain't forget what they did to my brother them

Be days I wanna crash out

And put **** under them

**** put a gun to them

Had my **** hovering

Had they mommy them sufferin

I shed tears, cause my shooter them gone

Droppin' tears on the floor of a funeral home

I from a island well known

For where they shoot at your dome

And shoot at your home

Leavin' all your loved ones to mourn

I hear about death

And that don't move me like that shit is the norm

No, that don't move me at all

Shit, and who do you call?

Swiper died after he answered the call

Remember playin' dominoes with my dawg

I never thought he would fall

Swiper tell these **** we ain't close

We ain't these **** at all

Got soldiers at war

**** who ain't willin' to brawl

I still missin' the days

Chub' would come by me and record

He said the ride is the ride

And then he died in a car

If only my **** could see me

If only my **** could see me now

Prayin' that my brothers them at peace

Cause I remember prayin' that they'd beat the streets

Mommy said don't stray away from G.O.D

But I hope He don't stray away from me

I hope He don't leave me

No one said life would be easy

So much money wasted

Gettin' wasted off of Hennessy

I was livin' in heresy

Here's a taste of my cerasee

Prayin' for longevity

My dawg had shorter years

I can't lie that kept me low

Mommy kept me in her prayers

I know Daddy say I careless

They ain't love me when I cared

They ain't love me when I loved them

Can't say loved cause I still love them

Lost my dawg cause he was thuggin

Told that bey stay off the road

He ain't know that he was chosen

That's a crazy life he chose

Ain't no judgment to my woes

Blew what they made off the road

I blew what I made off of songs

Life is short so we ain't wrong

You should see the way they treat you bey

When you don't spend this corn

You should see the way they love you

Only love you when you gone

The Lord is my Shepherd

People callin' me the goat

Watchin' wolves in sheep's clothing

Tryna play me like we close

From another walk of life

My cousin got it off the boat

I still hope you stay afloat

In that water ain't no feels

If your girl just want your heart

And not your pockets that's a steal

Know the lies get all the glory

Hope the truth gon' be revealed

Plenty fishes in the sea

But also snakes and plenty eels

I can tell you times I reeled them in

And realized they ain't real

Dreams to get a record deal

Father, can you play my record?

He say I promotin' sin

Who's to blame for what I blessed with?

Prayin' I stay protected

My brother's prayers were neglected

Ain't no joke, the road get hectic

If only my **** could see me

If only my **** could see me now

Prayin' that my brothers them at peace

Cause I remember prayin' that they'd beat the streets

Mommy said don't stray away from G.O.D

But I hope He don't stray away from me

I hope He don't leave me

No one said life would be easy