Sound Man

Okay, now let me take it back to this Friday

We had a show that night

Step to soundcheck, no one in sight

No one around yet, yeah, you know what it's like

It's the renowned rep, when they're never on time

And then five will mean seven, nine will mean eleven

This ain't live, what, did I die and go to Heaven?

About to throw it in, wanted to go home

Then the sound man, lookin' like one of the Ramones arrives

Barely alive, smellin' like death

In his Led Zeppelin shirt, jeans tighter than Bec Cartwright

He was just another barfly, rock pig

Livin' for the moment, livin' for the rock gig

Set the stage, two mics, two decks

Check one, two, check, check, one, two, check

I reckon I need some volume

We want everyone to hear, yeah, the whole room, the whole room

And yo, Trigga, what's the level on your decks like, brother?

Oh, yeah, now let's try crankin', I need more beat, it's too low, man

Get them out of their seat quicker than Lindsay Lohan movies

Move like I'm punchin' Bruce Lee

(Nah, man, don't you mean Jackie Chan?)

(Oh, what? Jackie Chan? Bruce Lee?)

Hey, what the fuck you tryin' to do to me, man?

It's nothing new to me, like I Love Lucy

Man, I gotta shoot through, but it's soundin' thin

Before I go, can you give me one more thing?

And turn it up, sound man, turn it up

Turn it up, sound man, turn it up

Keepin' it movin' from the back to the front

Keepin' it movin', every track that we bump

Turn it up, sound man, turn it up

Turn it up, sound man, turn it up

Keepin' it movin' from the back to the front

Keepin' it movin', gotta jump, gotta jump

Oh, I arrive at the venue

The ratio, ten dudes to three girls on the menu

Men who tend to wanna borrow my ears

And have a conversation like I haven't seen 'em in years

It kills me, and I ain't tryin' to be rude

But you're ruinin' the mood like the anorexic nude

And the rumor was the room was jam-packed

'Cause I ransacked my set like Mad Max

But I stand back 'cause next is Layla

And she steps to the stage with the flavor extinct as a saber-tooth tiger

But none love her

The only thing that she might need, her mic up

So I'm right up, head to the sound desk

Ask him to turn it up, where we had it at sound check

Told me to sit down, let him do his job

But this ain't Woodstock, and this ain't no rock

Turn it up, sound man, turn it up

Turn it up, sound man, turn it up

Keepin' it movin' from the back to the front

Keepin' it movin', every track that we bump

Turn it up, sound man, turn it up

Turn it up, sound man, turn it up

Keepin' it movin' from the back to the front

Keepin' it movin', gotta jump, gotta jump

Check, one, two, one, two

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the stage, my man, Drapht

The Pale Rider, my Brother Grimm

Make some noise (Check, check, check)

Yeah, when I step to the stage I'm a different man

Let me kiss your miss' hand, she'll go missin', man

Listen and pay attention, no tension here

Hangin' on my every word, every sentence clear

Then I hear you, I seem to be gettin' feedback

Nah, not now, nah, I don't need that

Sound man just had a rehab relapse

Drinkin' on my rider, drinkin' all my free Jack Daniels

And can you believe this clown?

Now no one wants to jump like a ring rebounds

And now I'm drowned out by the sound of the bass

Wait, stop, kill it, nah, wait, nah, mate

Turn it up, sound man, turn it up

Turn it up, sound man, turn it up

Keepin' it movin' from the back to the front

Keepin' it movin', every track that we bump

Turn it up, sound man, turn it up

Turn it up, sound man, turn it up

Keepin' it movin' from the back to the front

Keepin' it movin', gotta jump, gotta jump

Turn it up, turn it up

Turn it up, turn it up

Turn it up, turn it up

Turn it up, turn it up