chaotic

I have this paralyzing fear that I'll maybe go nowhere But God forbid me ever admitting I could be scared And I can't stand my friends right now, we got nothing in common But being lonely's worse than just having friends that don't care You said it looks like I've been going through hell How did you know? How could you tell? Ask me to explain myself Well I'm trying my best here to be brutally honest Nobody said changing would be this exhausting A foot on the break 'cause it's been making me carsick How could you blame me? Growing up is chaotic Don't wanna say it but I really think that I miss him It might seem stupid but I still look through all of our texts Who knew that wanting someone could ever make me this desperate? Don't think I'll do that again, and, oh-ooh You said it looks like I've been going through hell How did you know? How could you tell? You asked me to explain myself Well I'm trying my best here to be brutally honest Nobody said changing would be this exhausting A foot on the break 'cause it's been making me carsick How could you blame me? Growing up is chaotic (ah) And maybe I'm just blowing all this shit up in my head But I can't help it, no, I can't help it Fooling myself thinking that I'll never love again Goddamn, I felt it, I really felt it Maybe I'm just blowing all this shit up in my head But I can't help it, no, I can't help it Spending too much time on things I know that I'll forget But damn I felt it I'm trying my best here to be brutally honest Nobody said changing could be this exhausting Foot on the break 'cause it's making me carsick How could you blame me?