Scared I’d open ribs and you’d look past that

I handed you something breathing, still warm

And you replied like it was noise, like before

Like “damn, that’s crazy,” like “you’ll live”

Like my chest cracking open was a fucking skit

I don’t flinch at every word you throw

Don’t rewrite me into some fragile joke

I wasn’t begging, wasn’t baiting a sin

And that’s what kills me

I didn’t want blood, I wanted a pulse

I didn’t want worship, I wanted a voice

I wanted ten minutes of human response

Instead I got hate wrapped in-

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

Say it again till my brain fucking splits

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

Now it’s echoing loud in the pit of my head

Don’t tell me I misread the knife in your tone

You didn’t slip, you fucking aimed

That wasn’t care, that was dismissal

Cold hands pretending they’re clean

You belittled me once, twice, again

Then stood there shocked when I bled

You call me a child, tell me grow up

Grow into what, a corpse with a mouth?

I laid my feelings out like evidence

Heart on the table, no fucking defense

You know I value your words like law

And you shrug like that shouldn’t matter at all

YES IT FUCKING SHOULD

DON’T GASLIGHT ME WITH “SHOULD”

YOU KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN TO ME

AND YOU STILL TALK LIKE I’M STUPID

LIKE I’M OVERREACTING

LIKE I’M INVENTING THE CUT

YOU PRESS THE BRUISE

Then ask why I fucking flinch

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

Now it’s looping like a loaded gun

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

Instead you watched me come undone

You say your opinion shouldn’t matter to me

In your own goddamn apology

Do you hear how insane that sounds

When you’re the voice I let inside my skull?

I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you

And you act surprised when I’m not fucking steady

This isn’t drama, this is decay

This is trust rotting in real time

This is me screaming through clenched teeth

I’m not asking you to save me

I’m asking you to see me

You tell me to grow up, then you vanish mid-sentence

Stonewall silence like that’s fucking repentance

You poke at my ribs just to watch me snap

Throw insults like bait, then step back and laugh

You strip away the gifts like love’s conditional

Ask why your opinion’s even critical

While I’m choking on words, still choosing you

Still saying I care, still bleeding truth

I’m breaking down loud, I’m not asking to win

I’m telling you I’m hurt and you’re sharpening it

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

Now it’s a scream stuck behind my teeth

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

And now I’m alone with the fucking debris

How the fuck is it so easy for you to cut me?

Like love turns to ammo the second I get ugly

You say you care, then swing like you’re bored of my pulse

Insults slide out smooth, like you don’t even feel the jolt

Do you rehearse it, or does it come natural as breath?

Hurt me so casually it feels premeditated death

You don’t stumble over cruelty, you wear it like skin

Tell me you love me, then aim right where I’m thin

If this is affection, I don’t wanna be spared

Because the way you talk to me says love’s just violence

You learned how to do without shaking your hands

I love you. I love you. I love you

And I want you and I want to be with you forever

But it feels like you fucking hate me

It was never about the trip

IT WAS NEVER ABOUT THE FUCKING TRIP

It was me handing you something personal

Something soft something still bleeding

And you looking at it like a chore you didn’t sign up for

I’m sorry you’re tired. I’m sorry if you’re tired of me

I’m sorry I’m apologizing again. I’m sorry I exist in a way that needs words

I’m sorry my love doesn’t come with an off switch

I’m sorry I’m still talking

I’m sorry I’m still here

I always wanted to be with you

That was the plan. That was the future

That was the fucking point

But am I with you if you’re already gone?

Where does that leave me

WHERE DOES THAT LEAVE ME

Do I wait? Do I rot?

Do I keep loving a ghost that keeps telling me to calm down?

I’m screaming into the space where you used to stand

Asking if love still counts when I’m the only one holding it

I don’t know who I am without you listening

I don’t know where to put this if you don’t want it

I don’t know if I’m losing you

Or if I already did and nobody bothered to fucking tell me

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

Now it’s a scream stuck behind my teeth

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

I wanted to talk about it

And now I’m alone with the fucking debris

I just wanted to talk to you

I just wanted to talk to you

I just wanted to talk to you

Now it’s a scream stuck behind my teeth

I love you, I love you

I love you, I love you

I love you, I love you

I love you, I love you

And now I’m alone with the fucking debris