Armour & The Universe

My armour is too thick I've built layers of walls around me I function like a soldier at war I measure things Calculate things Observe I take up spaces in order to not get lost in my own All in me just wants to go back Back to your arms I can still feel your hands at night How they hold mine It's as if you were closer now Closer than before People say it's an illusion I have to let go But then why do I feel you so Why do I feel your being nearly inside me You touched me in places no one ever has And no one ever will What happened I want to hold you and touch your hair and be with you Once again This incredible closeness that got lost somehow Somewhere We all have stories And maybe our stories were too similar They clashed against each other without preparing us And I always wanted to hear more of your story I wanted to know you more I wanted to see What bothers you What excites you, What makes you doubt yourself What makes you see. Your vision Your dream Our dreams once united us and now my dream Is tearing us apart When all I wanted was to Dream with you Walk with you, sleep with you, eat with you. talk to you. I wanted to travel with you. I wanted to show you what I had seen I wanted to lose myself in your company And maybe that is what I did I got lost in you But shouldn't we all get lost in order to find ourselves Why does everything have to be so certain Nothing is certain All moves and travels I try to catch up with the speed of light that caresses my hair and Weaves in pieces of you And as soon as they are complete they start Dissolving again and the weaving begins Again And I try to catch a glimpse and I cry As I see it disappearing, Dissolving, In front of me I want to wear you and carry you with me I want to feel you everywhere I go Sometimes I pretend I'm fine With all of you dissolving But then I feel you again I can still feel you rocking Rock with me It melted my armour The one I wore before But this armour is new I don't know what it consists of I don't know what it does to me and you All I know is that I keep on breathing and I keep on Doing all the things I normally do Sometimes I seek distraction Superficial coincidences building up To major events that have no meaning Not in the big scheme of things At least not in a way that I believe counts But what do I know? I can still love you I can still love you We don't have to define things Remember how you said this to me? I was lost and I was scared as I was transforming And I tried to be the same but I couldn't I lost touch of you and I lost touch Of me and I lost touch I begged for it And I found it sometimes In someone else's arms But it was always you I longed for And what is this longing? Was it really you? Was it real? Are you real?