The Eton Rifles

Sup up your beer and collect your fags

There's a row goin' on down near Slough

Get out your mat and pray to the west

I'll get out mine and pray for myself

Thought you were smart when you took them on

But you didn't take a peep in their artillery room

All that rugby puts hairs on your chest

What chance have you got against a tie and a crest?

Hello, hurray, what a nice day

For the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles

Hello, hurray, I hope rain stops play

For the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles (Hey)

Thought you were clever when you lit the fuse

Tore down the House of Commons in your brand new shoes

Composed a revolutionary symphony

Then went to bed with a charming young thing

Hello, hurray, cheers then, mate

It's the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles

Hello, hurray, an extremist scrape (Hey)

With the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles

What a catalyst you turned out to be

Loaded the guns, then you ran off home for your tea

Left me standing like a guilty school-boy

What a catalyst you turned out to be

Loaded the guns, then you ran off home for your tea

Left me standing like a naughty school-boy

We came out of it naturally the worst

Beaten and bloody, and I was sick down my shirt

We were no match for their untamed wit

Though some of the lads said they'd be back next week

Hello, hurray, it's the price to pay (Hey)

To the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles

Hello, hurray, I'd prefer the plague (Hey)

To the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles

Hello, hurray, it's the price to pay (Hey)

To the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles

Hello, hurray, I'd prefer the plague (Hey)

To the Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles

Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles

Eton Rifles, Eton Rifles