Living the Dream

Well

I drink beer and I smoke pot

And I've thrown punches in a parking lot

I don't dance but damn, the girls still dance with me

I've been driven to drink and too drunk to drive

I'm half in the bed, by half past five

Hell why would I sleep at night when I'm living the dream

I'm a beer pong champ and a flip cup king

Who's no longer welcome at the Dairy Queen

No shoes, no shirt, no more dipped cones for me

I share wine and wisdom over microwave dinners

With the girl I date that I met on Tinder

I can't call her love but I can call her anytime I want

That's a booty call

'Cause I drink beer and I smoke pot

And I've thrown punches in a parking lot

I don't dance but damn, the girls still dance with me

I've been driven to drink and too drunk to drive

I'm half in the bed, by half past five

Hell why would I sleep at night when I'm living the dream

I throw parties on the weekend

That are second to none

Brought to you in part by my college fund

Keg stands, forty hands

Neighbors call the cops again

I only smoke when I drink

But I drink everyday

My only worry in the world is getting myself laid

It's a damn near miracle I don't already have a kid

'Cause I drink beer and I smoke pot

And I've thrown punches in a parking lot

I don't dance but damn, the girls still dance with me

I've been driven to drink and too drunk to drive

I'm half in the bed, by half past five

Hell why would I sleep at night when I'm living the dream

'Cause I drink beer and I smoke pot

And I've thrown punches in a parking lot

I don't dance but damn, them girls they still dance with me

I've been driven to drink and too drunk to drive

I'm half in the bed, by half past five

Now why would I sleep at night when I'm living the dream

Well why would I sleep at night when I'm living the dream