He Sued His Wife

He sued his wife cuz when she had his kids

They came out lookin' like little frogs and pigs

She never brought up the slice and dice

She had just before she became his wife

And in Taiwan, extended her legs

She was two-foot-four and now she stands at four-foot-eight

In Singapore they shaved her calves

And in due time, they taught her spine not too laugh

She had the duck bill replaced last Jan

He used to wonder why she waddled when she ran

And he called the farm up, hauled off those kids

He sat while rubbing his little brown forehead

He'd grown to love her and in the night

Admits he liked her snarl and her bite

And he looked above him and pity, pinned

Fell through the ceiling, and back on top of him

He broke his nose, damaged his rib

And pity stayed down, down, on top of him

He sues his wife, cuz when she had his kids

They came out lookin' like little frogs and pigs