I Love You Boy

I love you more Than before Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I love you more Than before Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah (Yeah) You grew up in a environment that was hostile and got wild Arguments you heard as a small child had an effect That left you with a lot to undo Your first words was screamin' at your mom sayin', "Fuck you" Imagine the visual, diaper on, already dealin' with the residual Effects of an explosive father figure was difficult Mama was miserable, his love felt conditional You better be perfect otherwise he'll be hypocritical Belittle you 'til you nothin', yeah, hurts to listen Neither parent knew how to regulate the nervous system Dad was reactive, mom was fatalistic No one to protect you, grandfather paid a visit To take you and your siblings and your mama far away 29 years later, she regrets that she stayed You were doomed from the start, you were hurt and ostracized There's a wound in your heart, survival mode, you traumatized (for real) I love you more (I love you) Than before Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I love you more Than before Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah (yeah) The monster you created to protect the kid in you is hard to manage Supreme confidence, deep cripplin' insecurity The damage that's been done is explicit and abusive and a critic Nothin' that you ever do is really good enough, is it? You didn't get validation from your dad So you replaced him with the industry and started to rap You wanted praise and acknowledgement and picked a profession that People who look like you don't get, now the range of accomplishments Bein' ignored, authoritative outside force That you, yet again, apparently, aren't good enough for All fueled you, your need to be liked and feel wanted consumed you That's why you call a chick every night to come do you Only to be left feelin' less than before Didn't have the tools to manage stress, you're at war with yourself, you need love Drinkin' to forget that bein' you is not enough Overcompensatin' in interviews, tryna prove that you right Maybe then you'll be liked Tryna prove you're worthy of approval you weren't shown in your home I'm sorry that I ever left you all alone I love you more (I'm sorry) Than before Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I love you more Than before Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah (yeah) You deserve a pat on the back and a round of applause The sound of this song makes you think I'm not proud, but you wrong Look how far you took it, international bookings You gave your family a cushion And through the hate, you kept pushin' Knew you had people lookin' up to you, you held your composure As hell moved closer, you a soldier, it's a shock that you were ever sober I never told you how I feel, I apologize Lot of guys would've folded, guess I'm not surprised You prophesized this from the get go Anything you wanted, went and got it 'cause you said so Packs of women fightin' over you like Shevchenko Seven figure checks, private jets Your best friends know your character You proved that by sharin' your Successes and blessings, but when you hurt, we hurt Breakdowns mean that it's time for a rebirth, so You carried me as far as you could go Now it's time to say goodbye, before I leave, you should know though, yeah I love you more Than before Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah I love you more Than before Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah