you in everything

I prayed the day you passed, but the heavens didn't listen So we held you 'til your dark skin dulled to fair Went out to smoke a dart, finally get some time alone But just broke down and held my wife beneath the stairs 'Cause I saw our little life ascending from the street And flung from overpass to overpass, collapsing in a heap But to cradle you the last days was an honor and a miserable feat I still need you in everything I will need you in everything The places you have walked, I consider holy ground And I will love the things you love despite my prior thoughts about And I'll think of you each day as if to nourish me from inside out Now I speak to you in tongues and seek for you in pain And long for echoes in the silence born of islands and of rain Every hymn and all the sounds that bind the many of us fiercely to the sea I will hear you in everything I will hear you in everything I prayed for you in song and kneaded through your veins And chased the morsels of your voice and gave you shots to ease the pain When you asked us for some wine, we bought the best stuff And we laughed and watched you drink Now I smell you in the air and I pause to breathe you in And I have torn apart your closet and devoured the scent within You ascend in every skyline All the water and the streets of Grey Lynn I will feel you in everything I will feel you in everything How do I face the world? Or raise a fucking kid? Or see beauty in the Earth and all its majesty replete When I've spent the better part of my twenties Doing self-indulgent bullshit on repeat? So if there's something of you here in the ever-changing light Holding close to my unsteady heart and bonding me to life May your spirit never leave me in the boredom And the utterly sublime 'Cause I will look for you every time I will look for you every time It'll torture me at first, then it'll hurt a little less And I will pour through every piece of you 'til nothing new is left Just your eyes in my reflection And the heavy thing now beating in my chest We held you in your bed, we washed you in your sheets And sang you hymnals from the islands 'til you drifted off to sleep Then I kissed the hands that raised me for the last time And stared out into the street I will see you in everything I will see you in everything I will see you in everything I will see you in everything