If It Wasnae for Your Wellies

Now you see, a lot of people don't understand the desperate importance of Wellington boots in Scottish culture. So this is designed to teach them a wee bit

If it wisnae for yer wellies, where would ye be?

You'd be in the hospital or infirmary

'Cause you would have a dose o' the flu or even pleurisy

If ye didnae have yer feet in yer wellies

That's the chorus. I want you to sing it with gusto. I want you to leap into it in a mood of gay abandon, gasping on the floor, paroxysms of mirth, clutching your middle, saying "Oh Jesus Christ, he's a gas", right into that microphone, 'cause these people in London don't believe it!

Oh, wellies they are wonderful, oh, wellies they are swell

'Cause they keep oot the water and they keep in the smell

And when you're sitting in a room, you can surely tell

When some bugger takes off his wellies

If it wisnae for yer wellies, where would ye be?

You'd be in the hospital or infirmary

'Cause you would have a dose o' the flu or even pleurisy

If ye didnae have yer feet in yer wellies

That was wonderful. Bonus! Great, innit?

When you're oot walking in the country with a bird

And your strolling over the fields just like a farmer's herd

And somebody shouts "Keep off the grass", and you think "how absurd"

Squelch! You find why all farmers all wear wellies

If it wisnae for yer wellies, where would ye be?

You'd be in the hospital or infirmary

'Cause you would have a dose o' the flu or even pleurisy

If ye didnae have yer feet in yer wellies

See that [???], see that? Here's a serious verse

Fishermen and firemen, there's farmers and all

There's men oot digging ditches and working in the snow

This country would grind tae a halt and no' a thing would grow

If it wisnae for the workers in their wellies

If it wisnae for yer wellies, where would ye be?

You'd be in the hospital or infirmary

'Cause you would have a dose o' the flu or even pleurisy

If ye didnae have yer feet in yer wellies

If it wisnae for yer wellies, where would ye be?

You'd be in the hospital or infirmary

'Cause you would have a dose o' the flu or even pleurisy

If ye didnae have yer feet in yer wellies