Singing Simpkin: I. The Crost Couple

Tune: The Crost Couple

Wife: Blind Cupid [common euphemism for impotence] hath made my heart for to bleed

With a fa la la lero etc …

Simpkin: But I know a man who can help you at need

Wife: My husband he often a hunting goes out

Simpkin: And brings home a great pair of horns there’s no doubt!

Wife: How is’t Monsieur Simpkin, why are you so sad?

Simpkin: I am ears-up in love and it makes me stark mad;

I am vex’d, I am tortur’d, I am troubled at heart

Wife: But I’le try my skill to take off your smart

And on that condition, I give you a kiss

Simpkin: But what says your husband when he hears of this?

Wife: You know my affection, and no one knows more—

Simpkin: ’Uds **** noggers, who knocks at the door?