Stand Up In It Part II

Hey everybody, this is old Theotis

Y'all remember me?

You know, a lot of people ask me, they say

Theotis, how did you write that song called

Stand Up In It?

Well, I told everybody

A little old lady told me a story one time

And after she told me that story

I started thinking about it, you know?

But anyway, you know, any of my friends

That know me, I mean really know me

Know that I like to drink

And one night I was hanging out

With my two friends, E and J

Last name Brandy, y'all know them

Anyway, I got home that morning

It was about four o'clock in the morning

And she was just getting out of the shower

She was getting up

Getting ready to go to work

She was all drippy and wet, oh my goodness

And old E got to talking to me

He said, Theotis, just look at her

Don't she look good?

He said, go on, talk nasty to her

I said, you sure?

And old E said, tell him, J

And I looked at my woman

And I told my woman, I said, baby

I saw that water just dripping all over her

And I said, baby, you don't need no towel

I'm going to lick you dry

And old E started talking to me, he said

Theotis, you got to take her now

You can't wait for her to get to the bedroom

I said, you sure?

He said, you're going to be okay

And I said, oh boy

You got to act in the moment

And you know what I did, y'all?

I took my woman, as I did

And I put her on the bathroom sink

I took her left leg, y'all

And I put it over my right shoulder

I took her right leg, as I did, y'all

And I put it over my left shoulder

And you know what?

I started doing, I started stroking

Yes, I did

And you know, old E told me, Theotis

You ain't just stroking this

You standing up now go on, talk nasty to her

I said, you sure?

What you talking about?

I said, he's talking nasty to her

I said, are you sure?

He said, you're talking nasty to a tanner, J

And you know what I did, y'all?

I looked down at my woman

Brown, brown, brown, black, pretty ass

And you know what I did, y'all?

I looked down and I said, whose is it, Johnny?

Whose is it?

Whose is it, damn it?

Whose is it?

And you know what she said?

She said, oh, Theotis, Theotis, Theotis, Theotis Theotis, Theotis

Oh, shit, goddamn, Theotis

Oh, she said, stand up in the Theotis

But don't you stand up too fast

Say, if my stuff ain't tight enough, you can't

I said, I ain't going there, God dog

And the moral of this story is

Is that you can snag it, stroke it

Rub it, squeeze it, tease it

Do anything you want to do with it

But you ain't did nothing

Until you stand up in it

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha

Woo!