Vault Number 76 (A Cappella)

Do you think that the world can ever be fixed? Is America buried? Did it ever exist? Were you hoping for a life or heavenly bliss When you stepped out of vault number 76? Feels like we've waited forever for this Dust off those chips and selection of dips Rehydrate those ancient celery sticks 'Cause we're gonna have a party down in 76 Today's a day for celebration We've been locked away, but we've been making preparations Sweep away decay and all the waves of devastation Now we're at the dawning of the day of reclamation Preservation of the nation Is a fate we've waited every day in dedication To build a haven, pave the way for generations Of what's left of Vault-Tec participation Deep beneath the wastes of Virginia's A place where we could have stayed safe for millennia But tensions get frayed after just a few decades So we're certain that the surface ought'a be a little friendlier Shine your shoes, 'cause the hour is at hand for Joining hand in hand with fellow man to save the land, so I packed some dandy apples in a satchel with some BlamCo Stepped out of the gate to meet the neighbours and it's blammo, oh Do you think that the world could ever be fixed? Is America buried? Did it ever exist? Were you hoping for a life of heavenly bliss? When you stepped out of vault number 76? Are you lost in awe? Well, you'd better be quick! Build a hovel from the rubble while the reverie sticks 'Cause you've got to build a heaven using death as the bricks If you want to have a life out of 76 I don't want to set the world on fire But your house will do just fine Got you thinking maybe now's a prudent time Add some traps to send the rowdy mutants flying Now, I'm an optimist, but was it a bad decision To make a mission out of living in a vicious cataclysm? Sitting in the wilderness and killing for provisions A vault may have its faults, but all the halls were air-conditioned Every dweller went from level-headed fella to a villain So forgive me if it's not what I envisioned But with citizens selected out of brilliant civilians I thought that some decorum while exploring was a given Hi, Joe! How you doing today? I haven't seen you since the vault barbecue last May! Alright! Awh, jeez! Okay! You can keep the carcass, I'll be on my way! So country road, take me home To a place that won't irradiate my bones Hear a silly, little ditty with a playful tone Transmitting from the middle of the danger zone Country road, take me there To a pretty, little crater in the open air It's a bright, new future so don't be scared 'Cause everything glows with a bright, green glare Can the world ever be fixed? Is America buried? Did it ever exist? Were you hoping for a life of heavenly bliss? When you stepped out of vault number 76? Is murdering suburbians getting your kicks? Well, we ask you to refrain 'til population is fixed Rest assured that every resident was carefully picked To be remembered as a member of 76 "Vault-Tec reminds you your purpose on the surface is to work to survive through adversity by working with the persons beside you." Nah, I never liked you! I'm gonna craft some ammo and fight you! There was a time I'd smile and pretend That I liked all my friends When society ends Tell me why the pretence? Bring a violent end To that white picket fence You missed my recital again! Now there's no keeping up with the Joneses I've broken their noses, I've stolen their clothes and fed them to the roaches That ought to show him for mowing his lawn while I'm trying to focus On my crosswords Cross words are through now Domestic disputes now descend into shootouts Truth is, Dianne — I hate your pecan pie This is for brining one round to my luau! Everyone's had that fantasy To be the last of humanity You might think it's rad to see What'll grow from this rad disease The mutations are past belief Who'd have guessed these nuclear arms Would give me literally nuclear arms? I hear ground zero has some loot we can farm So what is the harm? If we drop another couple of bombs? Who'd have thought the horrors of war could be awesome? When chalking 'em up against the boredom Before things were torched and We're forced to reform from assortments of morons A quarter century's quarrels laid dormant Pip-Boys and torches, blood in the porches Squash clubs and potlucks and nuclear launches Setting the Scorched on my mother-in-law is More fun than anything before the war was From Boston down to the Mojave You gotta get a hobby Like slaying all your neighbours and displaying all the bodies So let's all go to lobby and get ourselves a treat