Distant

C-Lance I'm sorry I've been distant It's not you it's me, I know it's been a minute Lately, I've been suffering, what's it gonna take for me to finally give a fuck again? Please don't turn the lights on I don't wanna face the fuck ups that I caused I can't see above the surface What's the purpose? Maybe I deserve this My phones ringin', I just hit ignore Still don't know what I'm in this for but I'm not okay, I've been feelin' torn Maybe I should shut up and listen more, but my mind is racin', this shit is war I can't do this anymore, I pass out at eight and sleep in till four, yeah Always ask myself like who does that? But i made this bed, I gotta hug that, going through my texts like where the plug at now? Nevermind now I'll just make it worse, tell myself it's worth it even though that's not the way it works Way too much for me to cope with, I'm so broken that I forget I chose this I should try to get some help but instead I just keep lying to myself I'm sorry I've been distant It's not you it's me, I know it's been a minute Lately I've been suffering, what's it gonna take for me to finally give a fuck again? Please don't turn the lights on I don't wanna have to face the fuck ups that I caused I can't see up on the surface What's the purpose? Maybe I deserve this Tell me who do you see when you look at me? Cause I've been locked up, it's hell, someone took the keys,h hotboxin the room till I couldn't breathe, cause i thrive in a place that I shouldn't be So much emotion I bury inside, fake smile on my face trynna carry my pride 2015 I could barely get by, I was fucked up, havin a very hard time I was Don Perignon at The Marriot vibes, but I'm still so depressed, I just say i'm alright, even if I got a chariot that's waiting outside, you can still see the pain if you stare in my eyes, it's complicated, it took a lot to make it and I avoid the mirror cause it's been hard to face it, I've been contemplating all these cards I'm playin',trynna figure out ways I could dodge the fake shit What can I say? I've been stuck in my ways, been a buckets of change but I'm fucked either way, please trust when I say there's no love in this game, I've been chasin the buzz but I run from the fame, I've been thankful enough to come up and get paid but I still see the scars from the cuts on my face, had enough of the pain but it sucks, its a shame that I feel like this when everyone knows my name, oh well I'm sorry I've been distant It's not you, it's me, I know it's been a minute Lately I've been suffering What's it gonna take for me to finally give a fuck again? Please don't turn the lights on I don't wanna have to face the fuck ups that I caused I can't see up on the surface What's the purpose? Maybe I deserve this