4 Lbs

Lemme talk how I would talk to myself The key to the lock at the top of the shelf Leads to what's lost in the dark in the depths The smell of garlic and death Awkwardly step and the farther I get The more I pray the holy father forgives me Cause when it's in me it's me I envy the pennies that's kept in the jar The sign of patience, comfortability I'm far from them all I tossed it in the yard It cost me an arm, I saved one so I could write you this song I hope you like it like I like being wrong When I'm too perfect I'm nervous I know the "right" answers I say it on purpose My whole has been a test I bubble "C" when I'm guessing You can see when I'm stressing Mind went blank Since seen black DVDs on the dresser Never the same Wasn't to blame I hope you know it If I could go back in time I'd throw it, so heroic But this not a Disney movie, mistakes must live through it When stakes is this high and the knife can't cut through it Just 4 LBS of pressure a do it Lemme talk how I be talking alone Can a house be a home when there's nobody home Amount that was blown didn't account for all the counseling, clothes Covered the doubt and insecurities of fully grown men Now pull him on in We got him in the cycle of sin See life doesn't end After you're detached from the flesh Grand rising again Not enlightened then you'll try it again More likely to win This time your anxiety's here To help you navigate through all the wicked hiding within But I'm not one preach Ask me what I see when I sleep Alarm clock saved me more than the preacher I'm just absorbing and pouring more than they gave me Cause I'm more for the people Than the ones in suits the corporate people When they're informing it's lethal The shit that they be sayin it seep through Misery Loves Company Me too Where the fuck does that leave me So now I'm the one that feeling uneasy I'm the that's hurting people that's hurting need me With 4 LBS of pressure Lemme talk how I be talking when talking bout death Am I afraid of him, no We sat down and had a few but I made him pay for him own And I toasted to life Eye contact was holding me tight And then he smirked and gave a look I didn't like As tho tonight was the night First thought, ok call on the Lord Last time I called he didn't answer before So with these hands ima do it I'm not a fighter but I balled up my fist Before I striked him heard a voice in the distance Told me with poise to resist it Instantly I came more to my senses Some sort of post nut clarity vision I felt very religious relief Come across me crossing street Looked to my left I seen death and to my right I seen Grief A head on collision Or is it just a lesson to learn Hope God's tryna test me for he bless stressing my nerves My chest grew to burn It soon became harder to breathe I fall to my knees I looked and all I saw was the reaper He started repeating A quote that told me I was the reason It reminded me the finger that squeezed it 4 LBS of pressure Lemme talk how I would talk to myself