album cover
30
album cover
30 wurde am 10. November 2026 von NB MUSIC MEDIA als Teil des Albums 30 - Single veröffentlicht
Veröffentlicht10. November 2026
LabelNB MUSIC MEDIA
SpracheEnglish
BPM115
Melodizität
Akustizität
Valence
Tanzbarkeit
Energie

Musikvideo

Musikvideo

Songtexte

Thirty years in the rearview, still no clear resolution
Half-lit recollections, half a head full of confusion
Weeks caught in the current, whole seasons of drifting
Decisions made sense only long after the distance
Got sharp with the questions, the self-interrogation
Turned a passing suspicion to a full investigation
Took a thought, split it open, kept checking the pieces
Mistook being ruthless to myself for a reason
Kept picking at scars like the truth lived beneath them
Kept asking who I was, what was real in the wreckage
Now I know every bruise doesn't come with a meaning
Or a neat little moral at the end of the sentence
Early February twenty-twenty, frost on the ground
Lost my brother, and a sentence couldn't pin that hurt down
The street kept its rhythm, city buses rolled past
While I stood in the cold wondering how the world moved so fast
I won't dress up a loss just to make it mean more
Won't call pain a blessing just to settle the score
Keep his name in the silence, a space no one fills
Certain days I can speak; certain nights I never will
And the memories catch me without an invitation
Refleksy Znaniy playing at an old location
Or the grove behind the house where the birch trees lean
One detail, and the winter plays the whole damn scene
Dark Circus took shape from sixteen to twenty-five
Nine years in the lab just to keep the mind alive
Turned the ghost and the greasepaint into an arrangement
Put the beast in the booth so it wouldn't break the pavement
Walked out of the mirror maze, struck a match to the past
Let the pyromaniac burn the shadow in the glass
Wasn't begging for pity or performing for strangers
Just locking the monster inside of the chambers
It didn't hand me a crown or a grand revelation
Didn't cure every scar with a clean explanation
Just burned down the cage til the smoke cleared the view
Left me whole in the ashes when the record was through
Clocking in, clocking out, let the daily grind numb you
Half the time wondering what the hell it all comes to
Late nights in the headphones, looping up a drum break
Catching bars in my head just to feel my lungs wake
I write less than I used to; work crowded the margins
But the urge never died, it just sat there and sharpened
Small circle of listeners—do they even need this?
Still I carve out the soul just to keep the head peaceful
Got colder with people, more careful with trust
More guarded in public, less inclined to discuss
Maybe the soft parts are still under the rust
Just quieter now about what matters to us
Still, new faces crossed over, left a trace in the frame
Trading stories in passing before switching the lane
Touched down in Burabay where the warm winds blow
Pine ridges and lakes where the quiet runs slow
Then Petersburg caught me—Nevsky in the evening
Summer Garden in the shade, and the city still breathing
Organ pipes in Annenkirche shaking the stone
Scorched walls holding grace in a key of their own
Now I'm thirty, looking back, and I don't have a verdict
Twentynine to thirty—barely felt the earth shift
Just a year older now, with the hell I survived
And an unwritten page while I'm living this life
THIRTY! Let the old years come back in pieces
Names I still carry, roads I couldn't keep
Cold nights made me harder, showed me what grief is
Left a mark on the skin that the years don't delete
I don't have a moral, no finished equation
Just tracks in the headphones and a life in rotation
THIRTY! Same man when the calendar turned
Still walking the road with the lessons I burned

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