I never thought I’d have the heart to tell you every truth I’ve locked away, but now these fears won’t cease to ache inside my brain. You brought me up and hid me from the torment of this cruel world and now, like a son without his mother, I face this hell with nowhere to turn. I face this hell with nowhere to turn

How could I ever forget the way you suffered? The way you showed me love you’d never felt from another. Yet I had the nerve to curse your name when all you did was show me comfort

Looking back, how did you ever have the will to keep a loving heart when everything you held onto had left you in the dark? From your stolen youth to your crooked lovers. Living in one state, moving to another. You somehow have the room in your heart to love somebody like me. Now I’m setting the record straight. Letting it all come through, I’m putting ink to the page. I realize that this was never your fault and I’m sorry

As hard as I’ve tried to frame you as the cause of all the mistakes I’ve tangled myself in, bridges I’ve burned at both ends, and my own self-loathing…I cannot paint such a picture any longer. I’ve spent so long holding in this bitter taste and now all I want is to remember your sweetness. But I know that through coffins, beds, love, and regret we’ve made for ourselves…this life is ours, so we live it

If this is the last thing I say to you, just know that I’m learning to love myself and I’ve learned to love you too