Cocktail Desperado

From factories to the daiquiris

The lowlights of the lounge

Their happy hour's not happy

It's lonesome, lost and found

When the have-nots who just have to share

Their television dreams with

The cocktail desperado

Who is never what he seems

The cocktail desperado

Hides behind a smile

Big gold tooth El Dorados

Ride you in style

And if you're not drunk or crazy

He'll still get you in-between

'Cause the devil is his chauffeur, honey

And love's his limousine

His booth is built for comfort

Like a big-time guru's car

He'll get you where you want to

If you want to go too far

El cocktail desperado's

Loaded deck behind the wheel

He got diamonds on his pinkie, baby

And his game's "Let's Make a Deal"

(Learned it all from Monty Hall)

From factories to the daiquiris

Get lowdown in the lounge

Them have-nots they just have to

Spread their lies around

And that cocktail desperado's

Like some Yankee from the South

He got a little bitty head

To go with that great big mouth (Hoo)