Not a Pessimist

I hate the way my mind makes me think Nothing good is working out for me I've been blinded by the evil side I just wanna see the good in life I feel like my oh my, my mind is heavy Making me believe That everything that's bad is coming Right to me Right to me I'm not a pessimist I don't mean to lose it I'm confused why I think like this I'm not a pessimist I can't leave my room It's hard to do but I try my best I'm not a pessimist Da da da Da da da Da da I hate the way I'm never satisfied I'm only happy for a little time Then I think of everything I don't have yet And it makes me cry Yeah it makes me like I wonder what I gotta do To feel joy for longer than two seconds I always think it's fleeting Thinking negatively for no reason Good times are only here for a season When did I start to believe these things Taking over my mind Everything seems not alright I'm not okay I don't mean to be this way Putting myself through pain Trying so hard to be a positive person My mind says no way I've read all those books, seen all those speeches bout the power of the brain I think they're pretty accurate cause mine has power over me I'm not a pessimist I don't mean to lose it I'm confused why I think like this I'm not a pessimist I can't leave my room It's hard to do but I try my best I'm not a pessimist Da da da Da da da Da da I'm not a pessimist Da da da Da da da Da da Nobody gets it, they think I'm being dramatic I'm not a negative person, it's a really bad habit Yeah there's more to me than you see I really wanna think differently I feel like my oh my, my mind is heavy Making me believe That everything that's bad is coming Right to me Right to me I'm not a pessimist I don't mean to lose it I'm confused why I think like this I'm not a pessimist I can't leave my room It's hard to do but I try my best I'm not a pessimist Da da da Da da da Da da I'm not a pessimist Da da da Da da da Da da