Watch My Promise Die

Caught in the spiral Of constant fear Numb to the sickness Distance myself from my blessings Comfort in my sabotage of self Embracing their poison (with a tightened grasp) The pen bleeds dry Tearing myself from the inside Run from the light Watch my promise die I beg myself not to let you down As I feel myself sink to the ground Strip me of my flesh Take what's left, go Swallow the hate, internalize Killing desire Desire to thrive I let their teeth sink Toxic venom stirs within The doubt consumes everything Is this the path that's meant for me? How long must I grow (to find comfort and peace?) Will the fear subside? If I give up will I (be able to breathe?) Staring into hollow eyes Run from the light Drowning in my own shame Run from the light Shattered reflections of you Run from the light Watch my promise die