Sobering Thoughts From The Mondrian (feat. REASON)

So, never had a handout, lately seeing the hands

Pain moving forward, but fuck it, we still advance

As God's still in the plans

Took fifteen hundred "Nos", that's nothin', I'm on my rants

That’s real

Look, I can spot a user, or greed, straight off the glance

Chicago in the summer, no burner, we took a chance

I slid to give the city my energy, and my plans

L.A. been too vain for me

Painfully been jaded, took a toll, put a strain on me, insane to me

A huge strain, ironic, can't see the gains on me

Feel my time comin', I need that shit here quicker

Vodka with a spritzer, networking to build figures

Pour it out when they ain't lookin', pour Henny, I'm still ****

This ghetto on me stained, removing it kill my inner

Hard to change the cards I'm dealt when my ****'s still dealing

I thought it’d be different

I gave my heart to cure my sickness

I thought it’d be different

Followed traditions, where I end up, look

Built my foundation with glass so y’all could see it clear

Stones casted at it but from the inner, let's keep it real

Heavy winds there should help the sail, but it sank the ship

Gotta break my standards and ego for us to coexist

Put it all in the music to heal my pain

I relate to Tom Brady, lost my family to the game

I made **** treat the story godly

Jealous forming from salt but I love it more than Lawry’s

Petty ****, I brought gifts to the pity parties

It's nothing better than lettin' 'em see you moving largely

Soulfully ended in it

Rode through the trenches with it, great speed, ****

This shit like gettin' a ring from the eighth seed, ****

You hear cheers, I don't buy it, that's a hate speech, ****

Look, I see through a grotto

I let my spirit follow

Tried to let my love lead the way

But that led to expectations and sorrows

It’s heavy wallows

Feelings swallowed

Can't tell if it's real, does this shit just make me hollow?

Can't come off that hill unless the love slowly spiral, look

Low range for change, I turned pains to gains

Love turned to strains, that path turned terrain

The doubt turned to rain, I drive that in my lane

Tom Brady, lost my family to the game

Nothing changed

I thought it’d be different

Need love there at my lowest

I thought it’d be different

Some bridges burned, some is golden

Heavy pressures on my shoulders

'Cause while I sold records

Sold lyrics, sold message

Know my soul I never sold it, REAS

Soulfully ended in it

Roll through the trenches

Look I’ve been scared to settle down

Part of that fear is worried 'bout settling

Mistakes, wish I could white 'em out

Too proud of my melanin

Ghost ride to the riches, tints on it for my skeletons

'Cause they been holding me down, got a fear about tellin' em, uh

I just keep 'em in that closet so I don't have to face 'em

All this fabric on me

It’s like I’m tryna hide my fabrications

It's like I'm in search of your validation

It's like, shit

It's like I keep saying like 'cause I can't commit to nothin'

Windows down while my speakers bumping

Hope it air out all these deep discussions

Not being honest with self, could be yo saddest sickness

Feel like I been wearing that mask better than Stanley Ipkiss

Look, I been carefully inchin'

But been constantly workin'

Constantly patient, constantly urgent

I'm constantly trippin'

I know my flaws and all, but constantly perfect

Constantly steady but constantly nervous

Constantly cool, calm, and collected

On the inside I know I’m constantly Urkel

Run in circles, been livin' like gerbils

Man, fuck the love, I need a girdle

Tryna hold it together

Lookin' down I see my soul slowly rippin'

Ask God to sew it together, REASON