The Boy Named If

I'm a lucky so and so

A fortunate stiff

You said you'd never knew me but I'm the one you want to be with

If I tumble from a tightrope or leap from a cliff

I won't be dashed to pieces

I'm the boy named If

If I disappear and I slipper from your view

I just step upon a crack and I won't come back

Imagine me

And I'll imagine you too

In a hollow of the bed sheet

Or a picture in a frame

I'm vivid as a summer's day

Then never seen again

Who'll pay the taxman?

Who'll place the blame?

Who'll point into an empty room

And whisper my name?

If I disappear and I slipper from your view

You will step upon a crack and I won't come back

Imagine me

And I'll imagine you too

Take my hand

We'll go to "Magic Lantern Land"

Take my hand

See the pictures they've projected

Take my hand

We'll fill our pockets up with sand

Dance in frantic passes

Till the grains all turn to glasses

Drums begin to navigate, the band strikes up a riff

No one will believe you but the boy named If

Who'll pay your entrance fee?

Who'll leave a tip?

Who'll say, "Listen here, Sunshine

Don't you give me no lip"

Who broke your favourite heart?

Who stops and never starts?

Who kiss you stupid?

It must be something you did

Who'll keep you satisfied after a lover's tiff?

It must be some other guy not the boy named If

If I disappear and I slipper from your view

You will step upon a crack and I won't come back

Imagine me

And I'll imagine you too

Take my hand

We'll go to "Magic Lantern Land"

Take my hand

See the pictures we've projected

Take my hand

We'll fill our pockets up with sand

Dance in frantic passes

Till the grains all turn to glasses