I Wonder (feat. Erin Kim)

Her mind was confused With a plus at the tip of a tube sick as she threw up wit a cup take a sip of abuse So she gets nervous cause her man left her after the sex And he jets she thought that he loved her you see shes 18 And she's a bit conscious about her dress and the reflection of her own image Timid in speech she's limited given a week With her tummy blowing up so that people can see But she decides to keep it, said no to abortion The feet kicks in her stomach comes without a warning she feels the pain though Cause her parents cry, and the shame eats her alive when she closed her eyes Then the day comes, she gives birth to a son Kim Sung Hoon Soon she holds and kisses her love wishing it never ended Taking a mental picture, hoping through the tears that her son would have a better future I wonder, if theres a smile on your face Sometimes i miss you, and long for your embrace I never could thank you, enough for holding on Dear mama, mama, mama Forever, i'll hold you in my heart So she wonders, what happened to her son next? Is there clothes on his back, food on his plate whats the context The recollection of the day replays in her mindset and the ways that she would try but just never could forget Well he's okay, and he resides in the states, a needle in space in which rain makes it a beautiful place Embraced by the culture and he's loved by all the members Until he turns 18 and his world gets flipped He hears that his mom is not actually his and that complications prevented her from having any kids and his real mom is actually Korean and she had to give him up for adoption cause she was young and was a student Lost and was confused And wrestling in the moment Am I Chinese or Korean, am I destined for this union? And if I am whats the purpose, I jot it in my verses So I replay it in my mind as I think about you I wonder, if theres a smile on your face Sometimes I miss you, and long for your embrace I never could thank you, enough for holding on Dear mama, mama, mama Forever, I'll hold you in my heart If I could write a letter and know that you would read it I would tell you that I never once in my heart felt hatred Reinstated, I would play a song and dance with you Hold your hand as i thank the Lord for creating you As strong as you are, cause in my mind I can't fathom The pain and the guilt when all you heard was their gossip And still you stuck through it, when they called you foolish And with this gift that I possess you probably loved music I hope you're doing well, I hope someday you'll see this I hope I mean I really hope that you know Jesus On a deeper level seeking just to know him better, I hope in perfect timing we can see the reason clearer I hope you're smiling now, I hope I cross your mind I hope you never second guess if what you did was right Cause I'm so proud of you I love and admire you so after all these years this is my way of telling you I wonder, if theres a smile on your face Sometimes I miss you, and long for your embrace I never could thank you, enough for holding on Dear mama, mama, mama Forever, I'll hold you in my heart I wonder, if theres a smile on your face Sometimes I miss you, and long for your embrace I never could thank you, enough for holding on Dear mama, mama, mama Forever, I'll hold you in my heart