Charmless Man

I met him in a crowded room

Where people go to drink away their gloom

He sat me down and so began

The story of a charmless man

Educated the expensive way

He knows his Claret from his Beaujolais

I think he'd like to have been Ronnie Kray

But then nature didn't make him that way

He went

"Na-na-na-na-na, na-na

Na-na-na-na-na-na-na,na-na!

He thinks his educated airs

Those family shares will protect him

That we'll respect him

He moves in circles of friends

Who just pretend that they like him

He does the same to them

And when you put it all together

There's the model of a charmless man

Na-na-na-na-na, na-na

Na-na-na-na-na-na-na, na-na

He knows the swingers and their cabaret

Says he can get in anywhere for free

I began to go a little cross-eyed

And from this charmless man, I just had to hide

He went

"Na-na-na-na-na, na-na

Na-na-na-na-na-na-na, na-na"

He talks at speed, he gets nose bleeds

He doesn't see his days are tumblin'

Down upon him

And yet he tries so hard to please

He's just so keen for you to listen

But no one's listening

And when you put it all together

There's the model of a charmless man

(Anything, you can do what you can)

He thinks his educated airs

Those family shares will protect him

That you'll respect him

And yet he tries so hard to please

He's just so keen for you to listen

But no one's listening

And when you put it all together

There's the model of a charmless man

Na-na-na-na-na, na-na

Na-na-na-na-na-na-na, na-na

Na-na-na-na-na-na-na, na-na

Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na-na-na

Na-na-na-na-na, na-na