An Evening in Paris in Cumnock Tonight

There’s a lass, works doon the road

All the lads think they have a chance

But the chaff will shin be winnowed

On the threshing floor o’ the Cumnock Dance

Weel may it be “one singer, one song” for every would-be bridegroom

Little dae they ken I’m the man wi a brand new bottle o’ French perfume

Hair slaykit doon, it’s a Brylcreem Boys’ parade

Nails sae clean, the pit bath towel’s a’ frayed

Hall reeks o’ smoke and it’s rained for a full fortnight

But here on the floor wi my lass fae the store,

it’s an “Evening in Paris” in Cumnock tonight

She’s a wren who wants to sail the seas

But she’s quate and contemplative

And she dances like a saft summer breeze,

does my lass wha works in The Co-operative

1, 2, 3, good luck for me to step on a Woodbine packet

Led by the licht o’ ma great little cig, my heart is bang in the racket

Hair slaykit doon, it’s a Brylcreem Boys’ parade

Nails sae clean, the pit bath towel’s a’ frayed

Ye’d choke wi the smoke and it’s rained for a full fortnight

But here on the floor wi my lass fae the store,

it’s an “Evening in Paris” in Cumnock tonight