Lube For The Sleigh

Every year, the story is always the same There's too many presents to fit in the big bag on the sleigh And every year, Santa knows just what to say When all of the elves claim the bag's way too tight And maybe we shouldn't do this tonight Santa gets crafty, 'cause Santa knows He goes to his tool shed, he goes to get The lube for the sleigh Nobody asks why Santa has so much lube Lube for the sleigh The lube for the sleigh Break out the Gun Oil and fire away Cover the presents in lube Lube for the sleigh This year, the kids have been extra good There's so many presents, so there's gonna be so much lube Elves break their backs making presents all year But this Christmas, they don't have to fear because There's lube for the sleigh It sort of makes sense but it's weird to think about Because Santa's old, right? He needs lube for his sleigh The lube for the sleigh Santa saves Christmas Then dicks down his wife Lube on the presents tonight Lube for the sleigh And in the midnight hour, on one of Santa's breaks Donner and Blitzen, they find themselves all alone And in that moment of pure attraction That's when those reindeers recognize "Oh my God, we really are animals Thank God we have lube" Lube, oh There's lube, oh The lube Lube, oh, There's lube, oh