Zack Paul Gosselar

This killer is really starting to scare me, guys

I think we should look for him

But the Battle of the Bands is like a month away, we can look for the Allwhite killer later!

And Molly Goodwhite is dead and we still don't have anyone on autoharp

What about Zach Paul Gosselar?

What about Zach Paul Gosselar?

Late last night they found a girl in the river

A week ago they found one with her throat slit

Zach walks by and my spine feels a shiver

'Cause part of me wonders if Zach's the one who did it

And I'm kind of turned on if Zach's the one who did it

Zach Paul Gosselar, where were you last night?

Zach Paul Gosselar, where were you last night?

Terrifying dreams

Terrifying screams

Zach are you the killer

Or am I just a horndog?

Um, Zach? Hey, is it true you play autoharp? Since Molly Goodwhite is dead, Megan, Maegan, and I thought it might be cool if we shook things up and brought a guy into Girlwhite for the Battle of the Bands?

Didn't I tell you not to tell anyone I play autoharp, you stupid fucking bitch? Why are you always trying to humiliate me? I'm gonna kill you!

Zach, please, it just... slipped out of my mouth, I'm such a klutz

Anyway, I can't play in Battle of the Bands if I'm in prison!

Prison? Zach, oh my God, what are you talking about?!

It's such bullshit!

Cops think I put that girl in the river

They say I snapped and turned into a demon

But all they've got as proof is a sliver

'Cause nearby they found traces of my semen

But I'm innocent even though, yeah, it's my semen

Zach Paul Gosselar, where were you last night?

Meag's scared to do it, so I go into the woods to rub one out sometimes. Whatever!

Zach Paul Gosselar. where were you last night?

And maybe I've been getting a little carried away recently...

Terrifying dreams

(Semen isn't proof)

Terrifying screams

(It's circumstantial, it's circumstantial)

Zach could be the killer

(Semen isn't proof)

Or is he just a horndog

(It's circumstantial, it's circumstantial)