Bad Apple

If I like it, I'm in trouble, if I love it, I'm dead

Why does everything fun put a gun to my head?

If it thrills me, it'll kill me, put me six feet deep

If the apple's so bad, why's it taste so sweet?

I went cocaine to cola, straight to bottled water

I went diesel to electric, but the globe is getting hotter

I can't even watch porn 'cause it's bad for my wrist

And if liquor's so evil, why's it stoppin' the twitch?

I went dairy to almonds, straight to being vegan

'Cause they told me it was murder and I don't like the beefin'

I can't even shop at Walmart 'cause they're calling 'em crooks

And I would love to read about it, but they're banning the books

If I like it, I'm in trouble, if I love it, I'm dead

Why does everything fun put a gun to my head?

If it thrills me, it'll kill me, put me six feet deep

If the apple's so bad, why's it taste so sweet?

If I like it, I'm in trouble, if I love it, I'm dead

Why do all the best drugs leave me shaking in bed?

If it thrills me, it'll kill me, put me six feet deep

If the apple's so bad, why's it taste so sweet?

Oh

Taste so sweet

Went from stripper to girlfriend, straight to being single

Now my mama's disappointed, set me up on Christian Mingle

Video games are killing my brain cells

All the fun jobs don't even pay well, shit (Well, shit)

Okay (Okay)

The internet says we're fucked anyway

If I like it, I'm in trouble, if I love it, I'm dead

Why does everything fun put a gun to my head?

If it thrills me, it'll kill me, put me six feet deep

If the apple's so bad, why's it taste so sweet?

If I like it, I'm in trouble, if I love it, I'm dead

Why do all the best drugs leave me shaking in bed?

If it thrills me, it'll kill me, put me six feet deep

If the apple's so bad, why's it taste so sweet?

Oh

Taste so sweet

If I like it, I'm in trouble, if I love it, I'm dead

Why do all the best drugs keep on killing my friends?

If it thrills me, it'll kill me, put me six feet deep

If the apple's so bad, why's it taste so sweet?