Patron Saint

Somewhere on the planet someone’s wearing cupcake pajamas

But not me, not anymore

I put on socks, I put on pants, I put on coffee

Even picked up the laundry off the floor

‘Cause one of these days in a week or two at most

The phones gonna ring while I’m having tea and toast

I’ll say “hello” and it’ll be the Pope

And he’ll make me the patron saint of letting you go

I’m letting you go

I’m all out of cream but it’s only three blocks to the store

Is mascara enough or do I need more?

Is it cold enough for a jacket? Is it bright enough for shades?

Should I call ahead and see if they’re closed on a Saturday?

‘Cause one of these days in a week or two at most

The phones gonna ring while I’m having tea and toast

I’ll say “hello” and it’ll be the Pope

And he’ll make me the patron saint of letting you go

I’m letting you go

But until that day I need eggs and I need soap

I gotta stop wearing your sweater and I’m gonna get my own

I’m gonna get me some sugar, gonna fill these cupboards up

Gonna take down all our pictures and put some new ones up

‘Cause one of these days in a week or two at most

The phones gonna ring while I’m having tea and toast

I’ll say “hello” and it’ll be the Pope

And he’ll make me the patron saint of letting you go

I’m letting you go

Oh I'm letting you go

Just waiting on a call from the Pope

And I'm not even Catholic anymore