Jerry Falwell's favorite deacon
Scampered up the aisle at church
Sporting lavender pajamas
And a matching purple purse
Wth a triangle tiara and the cutest little hop
Tinky Winky made him do it
Even God can't make him stop
So now Jerry's on the tinky
With his soft and supple ways
How he captivates the children
And recruits them all as gays
How he undermines their virtue
All that's manly strong and straight
Tinky Winky's tempting toddlers
And they're goin' for the bait
Do you think that Tink's the anti-Christ?
The Winky Viet Cong
With his decadent accessories
And tantalizing song
You beat the same old drum
Jerry, you stir the same old pot
Tinky Winky must be banned
Tinky Winky should be shot
Ah, but Tinky's hard to find
Out on a cold Wyoming night
Where two losers cruise the bar scene
And they're spoilin' for a fight
But they do find Matthew Shepard
And he's small, alone and gay
It's two to one, they got a gun
They're takin' him away
You know what happens next, Jerry
You know, and you know why
They left him hanging on a fence
To bleed and freeze and die
The word is father to the deed
The deed you can't undo
No, it wasn't Tinky Winky, Jerry
Maybe it was you
For the word may shine like lightning
But the thunder sounds like hate
If they came to get you, Jerry
Would you care that they were straight
If you're holed up in the bathroom
Would you finally understand
Why the policeman at the door
Has got a broomstick in his hand
Tinky Winky may be boring
Tinky Winky may be quaint
Tinky Winky may be holy and be canonized a saint
Tinky Winky may be dumb, Cherry
But when push comes to shove
Tinky Winky will not hate you
No matter who you love
I was scanning your old sermons and in one of them I read
Is it true? Is it loving?
Does it need to be said?
That's three strikes and you're out
Jerry, it's time to scrap the speech
Take a tip from Tinky Winky
And practice what you preach
Why don't you practice what you preach?
