Pure Bubblegum

She traded her love

For all of that candy

Now it’s tacky money that got stuck on her hands

She took his name

He took her to bed

Gave her a winding sheet and a long line of credit

I suppose a little cash is all fine and dandy

With his stocks and his shares

Pinned to her underwear

In time, more and more riches would come

Her way

So I said

Give me my daily bread

Even one crumb

How could she leave me

For Pure Bubblegum

Turn it on and dial it in

Broadcast to infinity

K-SHT

Missing one I, aye-aye, that’s me

The I.R.S. turned me upside down for my last red cent

The C.I.A. said, “You had better repent”

A.B.C.D.F.G.

Every Good Boy Deserves…

33 and 1/3 Flavors

57 Varieties

These are your priorities

You and your God-Fearing Granny

You and your Hatenanny

You and your Continental

You and your Lincoln Rockwell

You and your editorial

Your Flea-Market Memorial

Your Burt and Shirley

Signed “Sincerely”

You and your Snowbird

You and your code word

Mother’s necessity

Your secret recipe

You and your cherry pie

You and your pickled plum

Sit there and suck your thumb

Sing “We Shall Overcome”

All in a long-winded hum with a big broken drum

They can’t stick it

So for my next trick

Who can spend the most

Chew on the bed-post?

Squint at the blueprint

Spit out the peppermint

Sprinkle this simpleton with the powder of cinnamon

Applause for your escape

Scissor the ruby tape

Paint my nail purple tint

Dance in my footprint

Dumb down the discipline

For this fine citizen

Now see what I’ve become

Pure Bubblegum

Pure Bubblegum

Sprinkle this simpleton with the powder of cinnamon

Pure Bubblegum