Whenever I buy a Cider
I get side-eyed
It's like I'm not one of the guys
They think since my drink came from a tree
My dick shrinks I'm a femme delicate lady
Why I like my pine a mite fruity
Don't require tights and two boobies
I want it sweeter as it goes down
Don't prefer she her pronouns
Why act cruel at the bar for?
Swilling rotten apples that's hardcore
Won't catch me dead necking liquid bread
My drink's like marriage sweet but no head
So cool the abuse still one of the dudes
As I pour a quarter of the naughty juice
Just lemme sip a tipple o' the citrus
Without questioning my masculine interests
Hoist your choice of poison
Loud and wonky
I'm one of the boys
Next round's on me
