Dear Diary, its now day 16 without dick and im starting to lose hearing in my left eye and taste in my right

My friends all worry about me cus they think that ive been overeating and have an addiction to chick filet

When in reality, I only go up there to hear somebody yell my name for once

Wow I cant believe this is my life, look at me, I look good as shit

I feel my virginity is going back and my cliterus got up and walked away

I don’t deserve this, but what I do deserve is

Dick so good its got me wondering what size ring he wear

Or dick so good, I don’t think twice about being a parent

But instead im sitting here thinking about shit like this

Anyways I have other things to do like laundry

Ps don’t be sad laundry, nobodys doing me either