I Was Never Here

Now I realize I was never here And no amount of pills or drugs can ever help me heal What if I just disappear? I was never here, anyway I can feel the bottom coming up at me The sweats, the loss of breath, relapse and agony Bleeding, defeated and exposed To all these violent thoughts I'm a victim and a host I know that all these thoughts are not facts Yet millions of them are force fed and compressed Scraping the insides of my mind (of my mind) Forming a white noise Soundtrack to my life I can feel the bottom coming up at me The sweats, the loss of breath, relapse and agony Bleeding, defeated and exposed To all these violent thoughts I'm a victim and a host Is it nature or is it nurture I don't care All I know is that I want This darkness out of here I can feel the bottom coming up at me The sweats, the loss of breath relapse and agony Bleeding, defeated and exposed To all these violent thoughts I'm a victim and a host