Pledge Drive

I am living in an extra large box It's a nice, big, house, with a TV VCR Where rats are eating all my earthly possessions I called the pledge drive, I got the suicide hotline Life's little moments in an extra large box Courting controversy in an esoteric field Why don't the police ever obey the law? I don't know anything, you don't know anything Statistically likely to be wearing a shirt A shirt so white and starched you could spill coffee on it Statistically likely to be trying to stay hydrated But not that hydrated No one is mad at me No one is mad at me No one is mad at me No one is mad at me If woke dudes must die, I'll go first I don't know anything, you don't know anything If we must dumpster dive, I'll go first I don't know anything, you don't know anything And if you think youth has been wasted on the young and the wasted So now one of us has to die, I'll go first I don't know anything, you don't know anything I am a super grain, I'm native to Peru I thrive in the elevations of the Andes mountain range I am arguably ruining the environment and the local economy And you can substitute me for bulgur wheat This mob of teens with sponges is ready to wash your car I'm standing in the Wendy's drive through screaming, "Fuck all the transphobes" (Sir, this is a Wendy's) I feel nothing and I'm fourteen inches tall I don't know anything, you don't know anything Statistically likely to be wearing a shirt A shirt so white and starched you could spill coffee on it Statistically likely to be trying to stay hydrated But not that hydrated No one is mad at me No one is mad at me No one is mad at me No one is mad at me If woke dudes must die, I'll go first I don't know anything, you don't know anything If we must dumpster dive, I'll go first I don't know anything, you don't know anything And if you think youth has been wasted on the young and the wasted So now one of us has to die, I'll go first I don't know anything, you don't know anything