So Long, Mom (A Song for World War III)

(Introduction, spoken:) This year we've been celebrating the hundredth anniversary Of the civil war and the fiftieth anniversary of the beginning Of World War I and the twentieth anniversary of the end of World War II. So all in all, it's been a good year for the War buffs. And a number of LPs and television specials have Come out capitalizing on all this nostalgia, with particular Emphasis on the songs of the various wars. I feel that if any songs are gonna come out of World War III, We'd better start writing them now. I have one here. Might call It a bit of pre-nostalgia. This is the song that some of the boys sang as they went Bravely off to World War III: So long, mom, I'm off to drop the Bomb So don't wait up for me But while you swelter Down there in your shelter You can see me On your TV While we're attacking frontally Watch Brinkally and Huntally Describing contrapuntally The cities we have lost No need for you to miss a minute Of the agonizing holocaust Yeah! Little Johnny Jones He was a US pilot And no shrinking violet Was he, he was mighty proud When World War III was declared He wasn't scared No siree! And this is what he said on His way to Armageddon: So long, mom, I'm off to drop the Bomb So don't wait up for me But though I may roam I'll come back to my home Although it may be A pile of debris Remember, mommy, I'm off to get a commie So send me a salami And try to smile somehow I'll look for you When the war is over An hour and a half from now!