How About Now

You always wanted me dead

Well, how 'bout now?

I guess I'm gettin' pretty close

If I refuse the treatment

It'll spread out to my bones

Then there's no turning back

I'll be dead before the fall

I'll be buried next to the mall

The one that's sinking slowly into a swamp

And I'll go with it

I'll decompose next to

The place where I didn't

Have my first kiss

But I wanted to

I always wanted me gone

Well, how 'bout now?

Guess I'm pretty close to the line

Am I enough of a victim

To get it off my mind?

My world becomes so small

Between my bed and the hospital

I finish up another round

Then drive five minutes across town

I am someone I don't know

Hostage muscle to the skeletal

I cling to what I can control

Then barely grieve the things the cancer stole

And I downplay it

To family and friends

No sense in worrying them

But of course, they worry anyway

And I'll get through it

I'll survive it

I'll get through it

I'll survive it

But at what cost to me?