Parents Group Chat (Live)

Oh shit, this is it

I’m in a Parents WhatsApp Group

My life was going fine, now I’m spending all my time

In a Parents WhatsApp Group

It starts off really well, we’re all happy and excited

Then you hear about a party and your kid wasn’t invited

In a Parents WhatsApp Group

… You can put that shit on mute

But you can never escape

Someone makes a comment, no-one has replied

Do a laugh emoji so they don’t feel dead inside

Then someone has a question, and now the bubble’s burst

Cos 20 people know the answer got to get in first

In a parents WhatsApp group

Yeah you might have things to do

But you can’t look away

Do the kids wear their bathers underneath their clothes

What time does the bus arrive, nobody knows

Can you tell my kid I’m late, can you tell them that I’m here

Who gave my kid gastro, I’ve got no idea

In a Parents WhatsApp Group OH SHIT …

Someone has deleted a comment

Someone has deleted a comment

Someone has deleted a comment

Call your wife and find out if she saw what had been written before

Someone has deleted a comment

Oh fuck, just my luck

I’m in a breakout parents WhatsApp group

Feels a little naughty like I shouldn’t be here

Still it’s kind of thrilling but it just makes me fear

There are other groups as well, that I’m not in

No-one told me it would be like I’m in Primary School Again

In a Parents WhatsApp Group

It’s hard to keep on top of the information flowing

In a Parents WhatsApp Group

It’s three per cent of parents keeping conversations going

In a Parents WhatsApp Group

Please take it away, I used to be quite driven

Now I hang out every day for the dopamine I’m given

When my phone goes ding, and I drop everything

For my parents WhatsApp group