The Ladies Who Lunch

I'd like to propose a toast Here's to the ladies who lunch Everybody laugh Lounging in their caftans and planning a brunch On their own behalf Off to the gym, then to a fitting Claiming they're fat And looking grim 'cause they've been sitting Choosing a hat Does anyone still wear a hat? I'll drink to that Here's to the girls who stay smart Aren't they a gas? Rushing to their classes in optical art Wishing it would pass Another long exhausting day Another thousand dollars A matinée, a Pinter play Perhaps a piece of Mahler's I'll drink to that And one for Mahler Here's to the girls in the prime Aren't they too much? Keeping house but clutching a copy of time Just to keep in touch The ones who follow the rules And meet themselves at the schools Too busy to know that they're fools Aren't they a gem? I'll drink to them Let's all drink to them And here's to the girls who just watch Aren't they the best? When they get depressed, it's a bottle of Scotch Plus a little jest Another chance to disapprove Another brilliant zinger Another reason not to move Another vodka stinger I'll drink to that So here's to the girls on the go Everybody tries Look into their eyes and you'll see what they know Everybody dies A toast to that invincible bunch The dinosaurs surviving the crunch Let's hear it for the ladies who lunch Everybody rise, rise Rise, rise Rise, rise Rise, rise Rise