Evelyn St.

We were living in a 3 story building

Somehow on the fourth floor

I guess thats really just an attic

We still fit six kids in there

Two parents, beyond blessed

Dad was somehow always stressed

But mom kept us all sane

You watch my back,

I watch your back

Thats ALXNDR gang

Young and wide eyed

Looking for role models

Daddy would never let me chase short skirts and gold bottles

See daddy was a preacher

Daddy married him a Sunday school teacher

We knew the bible well

Not quite sure on how to live it yet

Dad wanted me to follow in his footsteps

My brother was the one getting respect though

My father and Alex

They always had beef

But when it came to stickie

So did the police, he was a beast

Six foot four, hustling streets

Couldn’t tell who to follow

The weakest wouldn’t be for me

Fast forward to fifteen,

Daddy still preaching

Loved and revered by all the deacons

Alex was in and out of jail

Until the judge went and

Sent him back to hell

Not Hades but Haiti

It’s close enough

Thats just what happens when you grow up

A wild immigrant

You try surviving 100 degree summers

And not toughen up

Seemed like the church was the safest place to be

Instead of roaming in the streets

Well since i’m going to church,

I might as well have myself some fun

Started feeling free

Bringing sinners to their knees

Fell in love with the touch of the keys

And how music moves people

To make them think and believe

Every pastor was treated like royalty

Following god made me want to become godly

Started judging my friends

Rebuking their sins

And hoping that afterwards

We’d kick it again

Then my father died

And i started to realize

That life is not something we can hold on to

So with my father in the dirt,

And my brother in the sand

I had to come to terms with what it means to be a man

So many questions

So many late nights studying verses

Trying to find identity in a book

Written by somebody who doesn’t look like me

Tells me to be a good slave

To follow this man in all of his ways

The devil is a liar but Jesus is true

But God’s works in mystery but the devil’s does too

My father’s in the ground, my brother’s not around

So tell me

What the fuck am I to do?