To Death's Heart (In Three Parts)

Didn't hallucinate

It wasn't strange

Inside the lines I drew

Been staying in my lane

Wasn't assigned to me

I'm not to blame

Brown bottles of Jameson

Grey ashes in a tray

I put out

Got cancer sick

Got on a plane

Visited the Vatican

To watch the pontiff wave

And he say

"Benedicente, benedicente,benedicente"

On a long hot Sunday

Got to get out of here

I can't remain

Limbs they hang like chandeliers

From alcohol and age

Down in the weeds again

Tough to explain

Mattress soaked in gasoline

Makes iridescent flames

I lay down

I'll ask my love

What will she say?

What's it like to live with me here

Every fucking day?

But she stays

"Agotante, agotante, agotante"

In her most gentle way

Still think of New York every time

I see your face now it just feels like another life

I'm up late

With an imaginary pain

Always did come in waves

All that's constant is, constant is, constant is

That change

Just grab the kids real quick

Can't start the car

Fading like a photograph

Your taillights in the dark

There's nothing left no more

To tear apart

Agonies are infinite

And sympathies just aren't

They run out

I've seen that void

Tried not to stare

There's bodies in the Bataclan

There's music in the air

And they sing

"Éphémère, éphémère, éphémère, éphémère,"

And "Wish You Were Here"

Enough blood to fill up this fish bowl

Keep swimming around

The exit's blocked

There's nowhere to go

All these same fears

Year after year

All the old ones reappear

Only difference is, difference is, difference is

You're not here