So late.

Been staying out early, Am I overworking myself?

My back will be sore in the morning again.

Fuck.

I wanna feel high again. Middle seat, back of the van.

Trekking cityscapes that I don't know. Block the light outside my window.

Don't you know? it's the same every place that we go.

The sun still beats on the North Jersey coast.

The cold is bearing down on my knuckles.

They're cracked and they're broken cause I'm overworking.

Backs breaking under too much stress.

Could it be caused by my flaws and all my laziness?

Starting to let myself go, learning to let myself grow outside of the negative space in my head.

Learning that death's part of growth.

Forcing habits I don't want.

I know you're all wasting my god damn time here.

Up north has got a place we can play in a rail car I hear and this time last year we head to a basement home in a Philadelphia suburb. It's just like Soupy said. And my girlfriend fronted the cash for the trip so I could experience how I wanted. My life's not bad, I need some cash. These trips are keeping me waiting forever.

I needed this.