Waking up fearing being mediocre, so you chase after success

But to get moving feels like pushing a boulder up hill

'Cuz it was three A.M. and you was up still tryna figure out how to touch mills

You keep it meek but some people peep the skill, and the will

And the way you've only grown, and you're only growing still

They say, "Hey, don't forget about me when you touch a bill"

And you laugh and smile, but deep down don't know how to feel

All that brings you is more questions, less lessons

Bringing you some more tests and less blessings

Contemplating why your close ones make you feel less than

Knowing no matter what they wanna do, you're there for them

To support them

To uphold, not control them

To really show love and not brush it away

Knowing that those you'd do it for jus won't do the same

Is a type of pain that you've really start to grow a disdain for

You've started to pray more, but then you feel crazy praying for pain to go away to the man who's son was crucified

And his presence starts to feel like it's just too divine

So you run from your problems and go running to that clock in line

Work yourself to sleep, wake up, do it again

Then you get a text from home that you've lost another friend

And so the spiral continues to bend, it doesn't end

So you try to cut the cycle, now you blinking the pen

Now you drinking the crown, now you going insane

Now you toying around with the toaster in the garage your family forgot about

'Cuz life's a boxing match I'm getting whooped in round after round

But no one sees me losing to throw in the towel

'Cuz whenever I voice my feelings, it gets turned around

So tell me, why would I speak

Why have I grown to need to hear from people I deem as important that they have the same love that they get from me

End this please