Have some pity on an Easterner
Show a little sympathy
No one possibly could be sterner
Than you have been with me
There's a JOB that I'm applying for -
Let me put it to you thus
It's a partnership I'm dying for -
Mr. and Mrs. Us
Before you file it on the shelf
Let me telI you of myself
Oh, I'm the chappie
To make you happy
I'll tie your shoes-ies
And CHASE your blues-ies
Oh, lady would you -
Oh, telI me, could you use me?
No night Iife for you
The birds would bore you
The cows won't know you
A HORSE would throw you
You silly man, you
To ask me, "Can you use me?"
Do you realize what a good man
You're getting in me?
I'm no Elk or Mason or Woodman
Who gets home at three
Your ties are freakish
Your knees are weakish
Go back to flappers
And high-balI lappers
Though you can use me
I most certainly can't use you!
